The Creased Pages

I often have battles with my own willpower. If I'm making a conscious effort to try and avoid doing something, my brain will immediately find a way to make it ten times harder. I guess that's just basic human nature, really. I may have talked about this before, but I've been thinking about it a lot over the last couple of weeks. There are a couple of things I'm struggling over at the moment, in a way it feels like I'm trying to keep control of myself, which is easier said than done. For example, I'm challenging myself to not eat chocolate every other month this year, as I like to tell anyone who'll listen. I've started that this month, and it is getting a little easier to deal with as time goes on, despite the odd craving. Although, it does help that it's being overshadowed by something else that's occupying my mind.

I spend a lot of time alone. I don't have much of a social life - especially in comparison to other people my age - and I don't have a lot of people who I would consider to be friends. Not counting family, I can probably count on one hand the people who I can spend more than a couple of hours with by choice and not start to feel on edge or anxious for it to be over. That isn't to say that I don't like the company of the other friends I have, because I really do. It's just that sometimes, little doses at a time are enough for me. I prefer, most of the time, to be alone in my own space, where I am comfortable and don't feel obliged to interact with other people.

Nothing is set in stone. Everything is always subject to change. Whether it be your health, the price of bread in the supermarket or your relationship with someone else. Nothing can live up to a promise of always staying as it is. That isn't to say that all changes are bad - much to the contrary. A change in career, for instance, or a new addition to the family or a move to a new home; these are all examples that could bring a great deal more happiness. Change is a part of life, whether it be for the better or not, and we all must come to accept it, even if we don't want to. Of course this would be influenced by the nature of the change and how it came about. Is the effect lessened if we are in control of and instigate the change? Or is it just as difficult? No matter the situation, each person is faced with a string of different emotions which of course impact on the experience and the outcome.